Emily Wyckoff

Turning into an embarrassing mother……

This is a monumental school year for my family – all three of my kids are at the same school – same days, same times, same place. It is truly the end of an era. I have been home with my kids since my oldest daughter – now 8 – was born and have always had someone home with me. Because of their age differences – all less than two years apart – they never overlapped at pre-school. Now that my youngest is in pre-K, he can go to the “girls’ school” – he counted down the years, then months, then days until he could join them.

I did have a quiet cry after I dropped everyone off on the first day. I walked all three kids in, saw them to their lockers, greeted their teachers and said a quick good bye. Today is day two. A friend asked me this morning if I thought my kids would walk in by themselves any day soon (you can escort them in or drop off the kids right in front of the school where someone makes sure they get in the front door) – her daughters insisted she walk them in for the unforeseen future.

My situation is anything but; at breakfast this morning, my four year old son – the “baby” – was begging to be dropped off and have one of his sisters walk him to the classroom. I reminded my oldest that it took ONE YEAR before she could handle walking into school without me. Times have changed.

After school, I used to be greeted with full speed hugs, kids flying into my arms. Now my third grader greets me with a subdued “Hi Mom.”  My first grader greets me with “Can I have a playdate?” before I can even get out a “How was your day?” I would like them to be a little more needy, but this march toward independence is a goal in raising children – I wish they weren’t so good at it!

So today I insisted on walking my son into pre-k and let my girls get to their classrooms on their own. Yet I couldn’t resist, after saying good bye to my son, sneaking down to the girls’ rooms and saying hi to the teachers and kissing the girls good bye. My first grader was tolerant – she indulged me. However, my third grader had a look of mortification and could barely look me in the eye. I didn’t care. I am one of those embarrassing mothers –  and proud. Isn’t that one of the privileges of being a mother?


16 Responses to “Turning into an embarrassing mother……”

  1. Ann Marie Hill says:

    Thank you for this!! This yearI also have all four of my children in school-same time and place. Because this will not happen again, I have committed to not complain about going to the same school twice a day. Apparently, I too am an embarassing mom. As I braided the sixth french braid(two for each girl) the night before school, my 6th greader said “Mom, could you please NOT take pictures at school tomorrow?” As, I tried not to cry, I took a deep breath and calmly said” Please don’t take this from me, If you let me I promise I will not embarrass you.” She understood and I did my best to not act like paparazzi the next morning.

  2. Stephanie says:

    This makes me sad! I have NOT been told I am an embarrassing mother.. yet my boys love me to be there at their school (i am a fill in noon-aid) I have three boys my oldest is in Kindergartin and my middle boy is in Pre-K at the same school… I hope that my boys don’t ever ask me to not take photo’s or give me the “looks” while wanting to see them off, Although I know they will… It makes me miss “baby-hood” already!

  3. Bev Spersrud says:

    My youngest started school this year as well. I now have 4 in elementary school and 1 in middle school. I tell my 13 year old often that it in my job to embarass her, I put in the mom hours and have earned this right. I think your kids appreciate knowing that you care enough to give them your attention whenever you can (no matter how embarrassing).

  4. Rachel says:

    My husband and I are childless by choice, but I could not imagine taking children to school. We both work full time so we could never do it and be on time for work. My parents both worked full time also and my brother and I rode to school on the bus from Kindergarden on. My mother took a picture of us before we left for the bus stop and then off we went. I would not have wanted my mother coming into school with me ever. She was there was PTA meetings, school class trips, etc., but that was plenty for us.

  5. Tina Court says:

    My oldest Grand daughter started grade one this year. I found myself reflecting back 19 years to when my oldest started grade one! I remember very clearly asking her if she would like me to hang around until she was comfortable. My beautiful daughter replied ” It’s ok mom, I don’t need you anymore”. I don’t think I have ever cried so much. So, to all parents who face either the first child going to grade one or the last child, you will always remember how you felt on this day! It gets a touch easier with time, but it’s a great memory to have!

  6. Casey says:

    My mom was very involved in our schools. I’m the oldest of four and my mom is a young mom. She was there as not only room mom but the head of room mom’s for not only two years but because of our age difference and the unbelievably weird school system, she was for four years because until highschool my sis and I weren’t in the same school. She did the field day for the elementary school for ten years as well. I feel like my brothers got jipped because she had to go back to work.
    I hope that I can be there for my daughter when she gets to school. She’s two. I hope that she is as happy to see me at the schools as my sibs and I were to see my mom. I’m proud of my mom she rocks!

  7. Ann says:

    As the mother of a special needs adult(26) and a 17 year old, I have always found that allowing the children to do what they are capable of doing increases their self esteem, even when I don’t feel ready for them to do them.

  8. dominique says:

    how do i get tickets to see your show

  9. micah says:

    i want to suprise my mom, because she is a great cook but she hasn’t been suprised in awhile so please at least call :)

  10. Mary says:

    Aaahhh. That’s sweet, but give your kids a break. Walking your youngest to class makes sense, but I remember how mortifying it was to get made fun of because my Mom was too clingy and overprotective. Save them the embarrassment. They’re in school in front of all of their friends, not you. This is about their social standing, not yours. You can always be lovey dovey in the car when you drop them off.

  11. Maley says:

    i, too, had three children less than 2 years apart. I stayed at home with all three until the youngest entered preschool. I juggled three different school schedules until they all finally were in the same elementary school – what bliss it was to have the same drop off and pick-up times. I finally resumed my career! Alas, that only lasted two years – my eldest is now in middle school and travels by public bus. my second and third had two different afterschool schedules. and me? I have been blessed by a newborn and resumed full-time (read: non-paid) motherhood. Life is full of surprises and wonderful blessings.

  12. Jane-mother of three says:

    I don’t agree with the statement embarressing mother thing….unless you Are an embarressing mother. I was once told to enjoy it now. Meaning, volunteering, being the class mom, parent on trips, etc…. because they won’t want me around when they hit middle and high school. Thank god I didn’t listen, because my kids still LOVE me around. They aren’t embarressed by no means. I think it’s all in how your presence is known and how you’ve raised them to respect you. When you’re around them with their peers, don’t try to be “the cool mom”, just be the mom there to help out. Hope this helps.

  13. Jane-mother of three says:

    PS, my kids are in 8th, Junior, and Senior.

  14. claudia hassan says:

    good morning ladies I have twon teenagers and they dont even want to have me walk them anywhere near school , anymore unless it is their idea especially my 13 yr old daughter, my 15 yr old son goes to school by himself 3 yrs now, and my daughter goes for 2 yrs now , both of their schools are very close within walking distance, when i talk to my daughter in the lunchroom , I am a school aide- she gets embarassed and rolls her eyes and says what? she is going through that phase very hard, right now. my son thinks he knows it all and that I am corny and old. i MISS THE GOOD OLD DAYS for sure, but they are awesome kids nonetheless, my house is called teen angst central some days , yet I welcome all of my kids friends to our home , and my kids appreciate this , and all of my kids friends show me respect so its all good ! teenagers are so complex , trying to find indepence and still needing mom, but not trying to show it , mostly it is surely a learning experience ! I went through this witl my two older children who are now in their 30′s and married and both young adults , and I will soon become a Pre K teacher , and I will have a whole classroom of 4 and 5 yr old children I cant wait !

  15. Sarah says:

    Both of my boys are now in the same school, one just started Kindergarten and the other is in 2nd grade. My oldest rides the bus to school, but my youngest I take to school. The first day that I dropped my youngest off at school, he said he had to go to the bathroom. I asked him if he remembered where it was and he said yes. As I drove off, I started getting panicky, would he remember to go? would a teacher just tell him to go outside and he would? So I parked my car and sort of ran inside. When I got to the bathroom, I heard the toilet flush and I called out his name, what an idiot I must of looked like standing outside the boys bathroom. My son washed his hands and came out with his backpack on. What a relief, to this day I watch him walk into the school, before I drive off. I don’t mind it if my kids think I am embarrassing, at least they will know that I love them and that I always will. Plus that is my job as a mother, to instill in my children that I love them and although they grow up, that I will always be there for them..

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